I live my life by a certain defined set of rules, and I totally hate myself for the massive amount of non-compliance with a simple set! I just keep making exceptions and exceptions and some more exceptions till I know the whole thing just nibbles on me slowly like red ants. Finally it’s a complete ant hill to carry. However there are some exceptions which I really follow. I am a firm believer in "You get what you deserve. You work for what you want!" Now the Bourneville guys were totally inspired from this but this is just more than cocoa. This is definitely some food for thought!
I was on my way back home from the counsellor when I was stuck at the Amar Mahal signal. This little boy, strikingly similar boy from Slumdog came asking for money. Now came in the strong play of my set of rules. I haven’t seen the world, but I've seen enough to pass a judgement here. I never give them money; always turn my face away thinking he needs to earn it. Now for the initial few years, it worked wonders because I was so absorbed in my self-righteousness and I never cared to look beyond my own plate.
Its only when you allow a certain degree of freedom can you cut some slack and have a broader view of things. However it does not encompass thorough solvency of rules, because in that case it would be severely detrimental! Anyway I was thinking, that kid is one third my size, he's not wearing any clothes and is just wandering around with a small bowl in his hand. Initial response was to pound in some change into the bowl, but then experience pinches, they'll all be coming like a pack of wolves and keep haunting till the signal turns green.
My retrospections got me to a certain degree of understanding which I never had before. For God's sake, he's 7 years old, how able is he? He doesn’t know there are 26 alphabets in the English language and I expect him to earn that money! He's been forced into something he isn’t supposed to and I expect him to earn that money! He hardly has the capability to fill his own stomach and I expect him to earn that money! I have to agree that my attitude might be heralded as the perfect way for the future but it was a bit harsh on my part to expect the same thing out of the poor soul. You could be lax once in a while, and it won’t really make your wallet lighter if a few coins could bring a smile on someone’s face but you surely are to think twice at this point. There are various facets that actually rise at this point.
1.The temporary smile on his face is obviously a good deed worth commemorating. It’s coming back to you, that’s karma. However looking at the bigger picture, you’ve encouraged an unnecessary evil prevalent in the society. I’m not trying to blame the kid here; he’s just doing the things he’s being told to do. I’m not even trying to delineate the fact that you need to be a cold hearted animal and just snuff the poor boy away. But as he grows, he will tend to do the same. It’s like an epidemic and needs to be taken care of in the right way.
2.You could do it once in a while. Now that seems to be a good and practical solution out. Not to forget diplomatic as well! Life will look sweeter because it’s only being done once in a while, when you’re in those generous moods and just want to do good to the world. Mumbai’s population is near about 17 million, imagine the number of people who think that way. So if the previous option is out of question, option 2 leads to the same conclusion of the eclipsing obscurity.
3.I’m an honest tax payer and the government should utilise the funds better. Okay let’s play around the first adjective, honest. We should probably leave it to your walls and crevices in your house. Probably a little conventional, but old is gold! But you do have a point there. You’re paying tax, where is the monetary support that these people are bound to receive? Super question. If you’d asked me a few days back, I would have been of the same opinion. Then I had a Buddha moment. The government coffers are usually up to brim but does the general public actually deserve the stuff that comes out of that money? And with the term general, it includes you, me and that boy as well. Okay the boy doesn’t have say over there. Narrowing down on you and me, we don’t deserve the public services, not one bit. We can’t even imagine of maintaining them, staining them with red spit and engraving names. Sure you’d feel like Michelangelo or perhaps you just got your Juliet but you’re nothing more than stupid roadside Romeo/Rascal. So it’s a little harsh on the government every time because you need to refer the commencement of the post and its implications. No we don’t deserve it, so don’t ask for it.
I might be straying from the primary point of the post but it was important to establish a firm view against the generally held perception of “I AM GOD.”
My point here is not to elucidate the fact that charity is something heinous rather than the hackneyed belief of it as a panegyric task, because it is worth the laud. But we fail to see the creeping lassitude which is slowly but surely a parasite and will threatens to grow big.
So, what’s the solution? Well I’ve been looking for one myself. Totally awaiting another Buddha moment. I am not a very big fan of social service but I have deep respect for the people who opt for it. Teach India foundation was one such good cause but we need to delve deeper to get to the roots. We need to elevate the standard of living, not only ours but others around us as well! As responsible citizens we could also try and sponsor education for one of these guys. Imagine how many people could be swept off the streets. I’m talking from experience, and I know it can work wonders. The government could build designated areas in the suburbs to fight congestion in downtown. Have a school for these kids. If I had my way, I’d take the right to produce kids from these guys. I know devilish but we need to CONTROL!
As for the guy at the signal, I could’ve ripped my wallet apart with all the change and make him happy for a day or two. Use the other 100 bucks to have a meal at McDonalds. Or I could go home and have mom’s food and buy a football worth 100 bucks and gift it to the boy. It’d have the same outcome, definitely but I did my bit against fighting the immoral and abject conditions he’s being poised to. Get up, do your bit, let’s make this a better place to live in!
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Saturday, October 23, 2010
Manual of Rules and other Horror Stories
It had been lying in my bag since eons and I really regret the absence of a mental acumen to go through such a fantastic publication! Heartfelt thanks to Neekita Singla for passing it over! It might just end up being a life saver! Here are some extracts...
1. There are no rules, only guidelines.
In an industry that values creativity and individual expression above all else, please remember that rules are merely a framework around which the job gets built, not some tenets written in stone that have to be followed to the letter like a fundamentalist religion. The wackis and weirdos make the business interesting, so if you want to bend or break the rules, be my guest: you may end up adding a new rules or two to this document, or losing your job... Be aware of the consequences, but dont be afraid to take risks.
2. According to the calculations of my engineers, based on the laws of physics and the known principles of aerodynamics, the bumblebee cannot fly.
The bumblebee, however, does not know this, and fliess.
This statement is often made in a distinctly disparaging tone aimed at putting down the know-it-alls who are so smart yet cant manage to understand something that is apparent to everyone else. And the morals drawn are many, including the notion of presisting with a new idea in the face of dogmatic adherence to old standards and maxims. No one ""proved" that bumblebees cant fly, what was shown was that a simple mathematical model wasnt adequate or appropriate to properly describe the flight of the bumblbee. If engineers had accepted this lacunae in their knowledge as the truth, the helicopter would never have been built.
You can never have enough knowledge, you must never stop learning, and knowledge is one of those things that you dont lose if you give some of it away.
3. Knowledge is power.
The more you learn, the more there is to learn: business is as wide as it is deep, and as you understand better what the experts and professionals do for your project, you will get better results...
4. Dont use a cannon to kill a fly. You lose a cannonball, but the fly survives.
... but use more than a flyswatter for a wild bear! Always be armed with the right tools for the job. This means people as well as infrastructure. It takes a certain amount of foresight and planning, but it will save resources for more appropriate situations, and result in a better job every time...
You could cut butter with a hacksaw, but you wouldnt want to; so why try to cut steel with a butter knife?
5. Learn to accept both criticism and compliments with grace.
In a business where compliments are few and far between, and mostly backhanded, accept them with a "thank you" but dont take them seriously, you'll get sowllen-headed for n ogood reason. Everybody is very free with criticism, but its mostly true, so dont take it personally.
I once told a friend who I often meet at a pub,"Stop wearing those padded bras, they look very fake!"(which was true). She got very upset. so the next time I met her I said,"Nice headlights, babe!"(which was untrue). She still got upset...
6. Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right.
7. Dont be angry. You need to have done something with your life in order to deserve the right to be angry..
Anger does nothing for you, other than possibly increase your own blood pressure.
8. There is more stupidity that Hydrogen in universe, and it has a longer shelf life..
Watch out for your own stupidity. It's like getting pregnant unintentinally: once is ignorance, twice is negligence, thrice is stupidity. Ignorance is an acceptable excuse once. There is nothing more dangerous than a fool who does not know that he is a fool...
9. RTFM
For more details, wikipedia! ;)
Cheers!
1. There are no rules, only guidelines.
In an industry that values creativity and individual expression above all else, please remember that rules are merely a framework around which the job gets built, not some tenets written in stone that have to be followed to the letter like a fundamentalist religion. The wackis and weirdos make the business interesting, so if you want to bend or break the rules, be my guest: you may end up adding a new rules or two to this document, or losing your job... Be aware of the consequences, but dont be afraid to take risks.
2. According to the calculations of my engineers, based on the laws of physics and the known principles of aerodynamics, the bumblebee cannot fly.
The bumblebee, however, does not know this, and fliess.
This statement is often made in a distinctly disparaging tone aimed at putting down the know-it-alls who are so smart yet cant manage to understand something that is apparent to everyone else. And the morals drawn are many, including the notion of presisting with a new idea in the face of dogmatic adherence to old standards and maxims. No one ""proved" that bumblebees cant fly, what was shown was that a simple mathematical model wasnt adequate or appropriate to properly describe the flight of the bumblbee. If engineers had accepted this lacunae in their knowledge as the truth, the helicopter would never have been built.
You can never have enough knowledge, you must never stop learning, and knowledge is one of those things that you dont lose if you give some of it away.
3. Knowledge is power.
The more you learn, the more there is to learn: business is as wide as it is deep, and as you understand better what the experts and professionals do for your project, you will get better results...
4. Dont use a cannon to kill a fly. You lose a cannonball, but the fly survives.
... but use more than a flyswatter for a wild bear! Always be armed with the right tools for the job. This means people as well as infrastructure. It takes a certain amount of foresight and planning, but it will save resources for more appropriate situations, and result in a better job every time...
You could cut butter with a hacksaw, but you wouldnt want to; so why try to cut steel with a butter knife?
5. Learn to accept both criticism and compliments with grace.
In a business where compliments are few and far between, and mostly backhanded, accept them with a "thank you" but dont take them seriously, you'll get sowllen-headed for n ogood reason. Everybody is very free with criticism, but its mostly true, so dont take it personally.
I once told a friend who I often meet at a pub,"Stop wearing those padded bras, they look very fake!"(which was true). She got very upset. so the next time I met her I said,"Nice headlights, babe!"(which was untrue). She still got upset...
6. Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right.
7. Dont be angry. You need to have done something with your life in order to deserve the right to be angry..
Anger does nothing for you, other than possibly increase your own blood pressure.
8. There is more stupidity that Hydrogen in universe, and it has a longer shelf life..
Watch out for your own stupidity. It's like getting pregnant unintentinally: once is ignorance, twice is negligence, thrice is stupidity. Ignorance is an acceptable excuse once. There is nothing more dangerous than a fool who does not know that he is a fool...
9. RTFM
For more details, wikipedia! ;)
Cheers!
Saturday, October 9, 2010
SMS
Evr wndrd hw dffclt tis 2 rd sms lang? Sm fuls blv ds lang hlps sve chrctrs bt d amt of hrd wk u hv 2 do 2 jst rd dt 1 msg is rilli wrth sm engg xam! D oda fuls blv in usin mre chrctrs 2 emphsze d xprsn! Here's a list!
Hot - Haut/Hawt/Hoot - Are you an Owl?
Lol - Laul/Lawl/Lool - Imagine Charlie(Kaminey) calling for Raul!
Only - Onnie - I am sure my dog can count the letters too!
Know - noe! - Why not use 'no'?
Really - Rilli/Ryly/Rili/Ryli/Rily - Thank God there are no other alphabets like I and Y!
Nice - Nyce/Nyc - New York City?
Expression - Xprsn/Xpreshun - Sounds like some Russian Army Captain!
Hi - Hyi/Hy/Hie(Used by Guys too!) - Too much!
Screwed - Scrood/Screved/Scrud - LOL!
My - Ma/Mah/Mi - Wow! Maaaaaaa! :P
Read - Rd/Rid/Red - I meant Read and not Red! :P
And the best of the lot!
Coming! Hope you can make the right word out of it to fit the orgasmic meaning! :P LMAO!
Hot - Haut/Hawt/Hoot - Are you an Owl?
Lol - Laul/Lawl/Lool - Imagine Charlie(Kaminey) calling for Raul!
Only - Onnie - I am sure my dog can count the letters too!
Know - noe! - Why not use 'no'?
Really - Rilli/Ryly/Rili/Ryli/Rily - Thank God there are no other alphabets like I and Y!
Nice - Nyce/Nyc - New York City?
Expression - Xprsn/Xpreshun - Sounds like some Russian Army Captain!
Hi - Hyi/Hy/Hie(Used by Guys too!) - Too much!
Screwed - Scrood/Screved/Scrud - LOL!
My - Ma/Mah/Mi - Wow! Maaaaaaa! :P
Read - Rd/Rid/Red - I meant Read and not Red! :P
And the best of the lot!
Coming! Hope you can make the right word out of it to fit the orgasmic meaning! :P LMAO!
Friday, September 24, 2010
Common"WEALTH" Games, 2010
I've been adjudged as someone who probably hates India from the core of his heart. Well there aren't a lot of things to be proud about anyway! And as history goes, one wrong doing will always TAKE YOU DOWN. Its a little calumnious to display my censorious side, since its always been about exhibiting the veracity of the situation!
2003, India pimped Canada to take the lead for the 2010 Commonwealth Games. Now I dont really follow the sport or something but its obviously something to hold your head high with pride and honour. Conversely, we had 7 years to prepare! Simply speaking, for a whole of 364 weeks we were just sitting on our asses, toasting our Swiss Bank accounts with colossal magnitudes, idling our time away until the ass actually caught fire, enough to cause mass conflagration!
I really liked the logo of the CWG 2010. Probably it was a mere object that belied the onslaught of the aspersion that was to follow! And the antics by the organizing committee is definitely the icing on the cake. Their statements are ludicrous and will probably serve as world class entertainment for the generations to come. We've been carved out with years of assiduous labour as the sublime laughing stock for the whole world!
Anyway, peek-a-boo at the national shame they've caused us! By 2009, the games fell way behind schedule. Like WAY WAY behind! Like they had to carry a heavy carapace! 13 out of the 19 venues went behind schedule! And they were supposed to keep a year for trial runs!
2 weeks before the games, you have unfinished living quarters, no amenities, POOR santiation and dogs defecating on beds! And they guys were valorous enough to come up with statements like,"Due to cultural differences, India has different cleanliness standards from the western world." Calling it ridiculous is an understatement in all kinds. I'm guessing a dog defecates on the committee's bed everyday before sleeping!
Quality control in India needs no awakening. I dont even need to discuss it when you have foot-over bridges collapsing because the cables snapped! The weightlifting venue ceiling couldn't hold its own weight! Contemptuous stuff!
An international reporter got into the venue with a light intensity bomb to prove the tenacity of the Indian vigilance. Labourers work in human conditions for less than 3$/8 hours a day. Thats probably what I spend on food in two days. So many countries have pulled out, that now we actually have a chance of winning a gold!
I dont know what are the implications of this event. I dont know how many people are proud Indians today. But there are some things for sure. 6 months down the line, we'll forget who Mr. Suresh Kalmadi is. That is pure Indian mentality. We might see him on Big Boss a few seasons later. If he has any pending court cases, they'll be cleared within 20 years and thats being optimistic! And finally the nail on the head,"Patriotism is the last refuge of all scoundrels."
I wish Adolf Hitler was running our country. Amen.
2003, India pimped Canada to take the lead for the 2010 Commonwealth Games. Now I dont really follow the sport or something but its obviously something to hold your head high with pride and honour. Conversely, we had 7 years to prepare! Simply speaking, for a whole of 364 weeks we were just sitting on our asses, toasting our Swiss Bank accounts with colossal magnitudes, idling our time away until the ass actually caught fire, enough to cause mass conflagration!
I really liked the logo of the CWG 2010. Probably it was a mere object that belied the onslaught of the aspersion that was to follow! And the antics by the organizing committee is definitely the icing on the cake. Their statements are ludicrous and will probably serve as world class entertainment for the generations to come. We've been carved out with years of assiduous labour as the sublime laughing stock for the whole world!
Anyway, peek-a-boo at the national shame they've caused us! By 2009, the games fell way behind schedule. Like WAY WAY behind! Like they had to carry a heavy carapace! 13 out of the 19 venues went behind schedule! And they were supposed to keep a year for trial runs!
2 weeks before the games, you have unfinished living quarters, no amenities, POOR santiation and dogs defecating on beds! And they guys were valorous enough to come up with statements like,"Due to cultural differences, India has different cleanliness standards from the western world." Calling it ridiculous is an understatement in all kinds. I'm guessing a dog defecates on the committee's bed everyday before sleeping!
Quality control in India needs no awakening. I dont even need to discuss it when you have foot-over bridges collapsing because the cables snapped! The weightlifting venue ceiling couldn't hold its own weight! Contemptuous stuff!
An international reporter got into the venue with a light intensity bomb to prove the tenacity of the Indian vigilance. Labourers work in human conditions for less than 3$/8 hours a day. Thats probably what I spend on food in two days. So many countries have pulled out, that now we actually have a chance of winning a gold!
I dont know what are the implications of this event. I dont know how many people are proud Indians today. But there are some things for sure. 6 months down the line, we'll forget who Mr. Suresh Kalmadi is. That is pure Indian mentality. We might see him on Big Boss a few seasons later. If he has any pending court cases, they'll be cleared within 20 years and thats being optimistic! And finally the nail on the head,"Patriotism is the last refuge of all scoundrels."
I wish Adolf Hitler was running our country. Amen.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Top 10 munchers!
This is probably going to be the post with maximum acidulous comments and opinions! And I choose to ignore them all since these are "MY" thoughts! Now if I had the power, I'd probably kidnap the main chefs at these places to a private offshore house and probably have the time of my life and living with the fact that I'll never fit into an FSAE car, atleast the Orion Racing version of it! Screw them, they'll realise the gravity of their actions someday! Anyway here's something to get your tummy working!
1. Ram Ashraya, Matunga - Beatitude bestowed with quality idlis and mouth watering dosas! You just CANT get bored of it! Probably after a hard night at the workshop, its the place to be at!
2. Grill House, Chembur - Indianised version of Chinese food served freshed with hot spices which make your taste buds go mad, LITERALLY! A little sidey, but who cares?
3. Achija, Ghatkopar - My night hangout place with Nikunj! Awesome pav bhaji and the chinese tastes better with the bread! You ought to try it!
4. Koylas, Colaba - Amidst the hookah smoke, the huge bread basket assorted with butter and awesome punjabi food with sauteed mushrooms make it a must eat place!
5. Ayubs, Colaba - The best place in the city for a hot grill! Barbequed style paneer and mushroom along with potatoes make my dates go mad over the food! Its gradual after that! :P
6. 5 Spice, Bandra/Town - Here's a taste of authentic chinese food served in an awesome ambience topped with the best desserts in town! It'll truly cause you to die of addiction!
7. Bade Miyan's, Colaba - No mushrooms but on the flipside they give a lot more variety than Ayubs! Great food! Must visit for all barbeque lovers!
8. Kobe's Sizzlers, All over the city - Steaming fresh with vegetables, gets a HUMONGOUS smile on my mom's face since its the first on the list thats quite healthy! I'd head anytime of the day here!
9. Chili's, Powai - It might drill a huge hole in the pocket but the size of the burger and its taste is probably worth the hole! Great food, gets your tummy working and you ought not to leave the place without stuffing yourself beyond what you actually can!
Now at this point I'd love to add the 15" paratha I had at Chandni Chowk but I cant! And probably most of this list would be taken over by Delhi with a lot of ease but lets stick to the neighbourhood!
10. Bhagat Tarachand, Vashi - AWESOME. Period.
Now it might take some time to digest this heavy food, some of you'll must have tried it as well! Take some time to contemplate and if you do not agree, good for you! For the others who've missed out on any of these, you're probably wasting a lot of time warming the chair sitting in front of the computer! Get up, get out, HOG! :D
1. Ram Ashraya, Matunga - Beatitude bestowed with quality idlis and mouth watering dosas! You just CANT get bored of it! Probably after a hard night at the workshop, its the place to be at!
2. Grill House, Chembur - Indianised version of Chinese food served freshed with hot spices which make your taste buds go mad, LITERALLY! A little sidey, but who cares?
3. Achija, Ghatkopar - My night hangout place with Nikunj! Awesome pav bhaji and the chinese tastes better with the bread! You ought to try it!
4. Koylas, Colaba - Amidst the hookah smoke, the huge bread basket assorted with butter and awesome punjabi food with sauteed mushrooms make it a must eat place!
5. Ayubs, Colaba - The best place in the city for a hot grill! Barbequed style paneer and mushroom along with potatoes make my dates go mad over the food! Its gradual after that! :P
6. 5 Spice, Bandra/Town - Here's a taste of authentic chinese food served in an awesome ambience topped with the best desserts in town! It'll truly cause you to die of addiction!
7. Bade Miyan's, Colaba - No mushrooms but on the flipside they give a lot more variety than Ayubs! Great food! Must visit for all barbeque lovers!
8. Kobe's Sizzlers, All over the city - Steaming fresh with vegetables, gets a HUMONGOUS smile on my mom's face since its the first on the list thats quite healthy! I'd head anytime of the day here!
9. Chili's, Powai - It might drill a huge hole in the pocket but the size of the burger and its taste is probably worth the hole! Great food, gets your tummy working and you ought not to leave the place without stuffing yourself beyond what you actually can!
Now at this point I'd love to add the 15" paratha I had at Chandni Chowk but I cant! And probably most of this list would be taken over by Delhi with a lot of ease but lets stick to the neighbourhood!
10. Bhagat Tarachand, Vashi - AWESOME. Period.
Now it might take some time to digest this heavy food, some of you'll must have tried it as well! Take some time to contemplate and if you do not agree, good for you! For the others who've missed out on any of these, you're probably wasting a lot of time warming the chair sitting in front of the computer! Get up, get out, HOG! :D
Saturday, July 3, 2010
Two Wheel Endemic - Desh Ki Dhadhkan??
A million internal combustion engine powered machines pump through the country's arteries everyday! However those helmet clad self proclaimed cool dudes and adorning huge Gucci sunglasses, probably even more bigger than their face racing around like ninjas population are blocking the Aorta and the normalties might just run a severe cardiac arrest!
Only after I got my licence did I pay attention to these bikers! They race around the streets like Valentino Rossi thinking for every dangerous cut they make, they'll get brownie points and move up on the list of the deadliest bikers in India! Dont worry, once you ride a bike, you're stamped on your forehead,"Yes I'm deadly! I probably caused disasters worse than 9/11!"
For once I actually wish the laws of Physics could be violated! For every degree of banking they should lose as much grip as possible! Only then will those single minded fools learn how to drive straight and not rock around like a speedboat from Mexico! And no its not only the CBR's and Hayabusa's but people actually perform it on Splendours, CT-100s and Activas! Oh yes! Now is that talent? LOL! Then even Justin Beiber can sing! The point is there's no point in showing off so much by revving that throttle, performing a wheelie! Go burn the rubber on some lonely asphalt!
Then the ones with those huge bikes, the eliminators thinking those are in the league of Harley Davidson! Hmmmm....LAME! I actually crashed my car into one of them! And guess what the guy thought! I'm at Monza, curving into the dangerous Ascari chicane! Casey Stoner is on my ass, I gotta pick up the speed no matter if I'm joining some highway at the end of the road! I've gotta stop Casey, no matter what! Zoooom he went and his ephemeral success was suddenly brought to light! BRAKE MAAR! What's more he was riding with someone else who scratched his back, and he's asking me for cash! This is exactly the point where your ego stands tall! But wait a minute, its not my fault! I'm getting home, sorry to interrupt with your race and you're making me pay because you crashed out?
The other day I was riding on the Eastern Expressway! Foul mood means I treat my car like the bikers! Even nanometres are scrutinized and lanes are cut like warm bread! Anyway I was pretty fast! At that time I was feeling a perfectly ambivalent state of mind, because driving was taking it away! I was in between the 1st and the 2nd lane and saw a little gap opening up! And to my horror, a biker with a pillion rider! If I had made my move, I surely would've killed two people but without any regrets! Braked hard, good enough to probably burn my discs! I honked like mad! Yea when I'm irritated I just keep honking, probably continuously to drain my battery until they move out of the way! However this guy was adamant! He wouldnt budge! And for the rest of the road I was stuck between a truck and bus! Heavenly feeling!! :P
They wear those Kimi Raikkonen replica helmets! Too bad not even 1% of Kimi's skill is transferred on such mediocre actions! You've been embellished with man's 3rd best creation though funny it doesnt give more than 40% efficiency! Make good use of it rather than running over people! Desultory performances are often condoned even by remotely smart people!
I hate bikers, probably more than Justin Beiber and Williams Sisters and Sergio Busquets and Tom Henning Ovrebo and others on my hitlist! Dont delineate something to hate, something extremely caustic to your ownself! Be safe, ride safe and let our cuspids work with enough efficacy to leave the veins from coagulation! Cheers!
Only after I got my licence did I pay attention to these bikers! They race around the streets like Valentino Rossi thinking for every dangerous cut they make, they'll get brownie points and move up on the list of the deadliest bikers in India! Dont worry, once you ride a bike, you're stamped on your forehead,"Yes I'm deadly! I probably caused disasters worse than 9/11!"
For once I actually wish the laws of Physics could be violated! For every degree of banking they should lose as much grip as possible! Only then will those single minded fools learn how to drive straight and not rock around like a speedboat from Mexico! And no its not only the CBR's and Hayabusa's but people actually perform it on Splendours, CT-100s and Activas! Oh yes! Now is that talent? LOL! Then even Justin Beiber can sing! The point is there's no point in showing off so much by revving that throttle, performing a wheelie! Go burn the rubber on some lonely asphalt!
Then the ones with those huge bikes, the eliminators thinking those are in the league of Harley Davidson! Hmmmm....LAME! I actually crashed my car into one of them! And guess what the guy thought! I'm at Monza, curving into the dangerous Ascari chicane! Casey Stoner is on my ass, I gotta pick up the speed no matter if I'm joining some highway at the end of the road! I've gotta stop Casey, no matter what! Zoooom he went and his ephemeral success was suddenly brought to light! BRAKE MAAR! What's more he was riding with someone else who scratched his back, and he's asking me for cash! This is exactly the point where your ego stands tall! But wait a minute, its not my fault! I'm getting home, sorry to interrupt with your race and you're making me pay because you crashed out?
The other day I was riding on the Eastern Expressway! Foul mood means I treat my car like the bikers! Even nanometres are scrutinized and lanes are cut like warm bread! Anyway I was pretty fast! At that time I was feeling a perfectly ambivalent state of mind, because driving was taking it away! I was in between the 1st and the 2nd lane and saw a little gap opening up! And to my horror, a biker with a pillion rider! If I had made my move, I surely would've killed two people but without any regrets! Braked hard, good enough to probably burn my discs! I honked like mad! Yea when I'm irritated I just keep honking, probably continuously to drain my battery until they move out of the way! However this guy was adamant! He wouldnt budge! And for the rest of the road I was stuck between a truck and bus! Heavenly feeling!! :P
They wear those Kimi Raikkonen replica helmets! Too bad not even 1% of Kimi's skill is transferred on such mediocre actions! You've been embellished with man's 3rd best creation though funny it doesnt give more than 40% efficiency! Make good use of it rather than running over people! Desultory performances are often condoned even by remotely smart people!
I hate bikers, probably more than Justin Beiber and Williams Sisters and Sergio Busquets and Tom Henning Ovrebo and others on my hitlist! Dont delineate something to hate, something extremely caustic to your ownself! Be safe, ride safe and let our cuspids work with enough efficacy to leave the veins from coagulation! Cheers!
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
The Great Indian J(oke)udicial System!
Order Order!
Lets take a sneak peak into the World's most ridiculed judicial system! India has the biggest constitution in the World. Something to be proud of? Ummmm, crime rates are probably accelerating faster than Buggati Veyron! The root of the problem actually lies in the consistency of these rules! They're incomprehensive like English to a Bihari! The ones who drafted it, took 3 years to do it! They just forgot India has a life after they die! They did leave us with the procedure of amendment, just that its too complex, even more difficult than understanding Neurosurgery!
Anyway remembering the most remote version of Civics, the Executive is to be differentiated from the Judiciary! There should be no interference! Thats the ground rule! Okay funny because one guy makes the law the other guy executes it! They're talking like they're absolute experts on how things work! Good for them! We'll stick to the ground rule and deep dive into the judiciary wing!
Procedures! India is a country with procedure. Everything goes according to procedure! No no, we have a lot of time on our hands! We have to do everything by the book and then get fucked by the book as well! I'm not asking you to break the rules, but we can bend the rules to speed up proceedings. There are nearly 30 million pending cases in India, 30 million! Thats more than double the population of Mumbai! And we're still gonna do it by the book! Apparently even if all courts work day and night, 24 hours, they'll clear all the cases in another 320 years! Yes thats correct, 320 years! My grand grand grand children will be dead by then! And we're still gonna do it by the book!
Paperwork! The day India shifts to electronic systems, I'll probably stop taking the case of those poor Williams sisters! Everything has to be on paper! Come on guys seriously? We can save jungles by saving on those useless junk of archives that you're making for nothing! Further reference for cases can be done on computers! Why arent we using modern systems? Why are we still stuck on stone age? Adam and Eve would've had a facepalm moment by now! And then they come preaching about Global Warming!
The court is adjourned. We should have the electric chair for the retard who says this again and again for no reason. The court is adjourned for this break, that break, for the day, for 2 weeks, 10 weeks! Sit at home and enjoy your freaking food! You're here to speed up justice not speed up the list of cases!
Its really saddening to know this. The Chief Justice of the Supreme Court and High Court draw maximum salary in a bid to keep them off outside influence. Now even with all the government benefits, their salary cumulates to around Rs. 40,000 a month! What a JOKE! 40 grand a month for the loser who cant speed up justice! And then you say he should'nt be prone to outside influence! Two ways of looking at this is dishonorable impeachment in public or stepping it up to actually keep their coffers full of cash!
India doesnt even have a fully defined WITSEC plan! If you're not gonna protect your witness in an extreme high profile case then you cant blame him to go hostile! Duh! You would have done that yourself! I mean seriously you want me to step and put my life on stake for the sake of truth in an occurrence where I was just present for no fault of mine? Sure, I'd even want to sleep with some 3rd grade mallu porn actress! The Police lose key evidence thanks to negligence and not centralized evidence archiving is present in any city! Come on guys, wake up!
I feel for people who actually look up to these money making boulders for justice. No one really cares about what is happening. A girl gets raped today, she finally gathers some courage to file the case. The inspector might be bought off. If the case manages to go ahead to the court it'll come after some years, probably 10-15 when the girl is either dead or even over her trauma. And then she has to go through the whole procedure again. If the guy is charged with the crime, he can pay his way out by getting an expensive lawyer compared to the court hired magistrate. He could pay the judge off. He could pay a bail and be let off easily. So much wait for such an end? Yea sure its fitting!
Qasab is still enjoying the cherries of the Indian Judicial Ice cream he eats everyday. They cant find a hangman to hang him? Good enough to burn 4 crores on him though! Jessica Lall case took 7 years to bring the guilty to justice. The legal loopholes were exploited beyond all means to seek a parole which took another two weeks to ratify by the High Court! He got a 30 day parole! The issue went to the Supreme Court and in 2010 the sentence has been upheld, Jessica Lall was murdered in 1999! 11 years and the case is still on! Superb work guys! Funnily the guilty were also almost acquitted!
Here's a little line from there,"The police failed to recover the weapon which was used to fire at Jessica Lal as well as prove their theory that the two cartridges, emptied shells of which were recovered from the spot, were fired from one weapon,; “all three eyewitnesses listed by the police in its charge sheet, namely, Shiv Lal Yadav, an electrician at Tamarind Court, actor Shyan Munshi and Karan Rajput, a visitor at the restaurant that night, turning hostile during the trial."
The Bhopal Gas Tragedy totally adds to it! A leakage of Methyl Isocyanite killed 2300 people in 1984. The legal issue went on and on and on and on and on until 2010. It was because of a takeover of the Union Carbide Factory. And finally 8 ex employes were charged with $2000 fine and 2 years of imprisonment for death due to negligience. 25 years later! The case has hit a silver jubilee and all the families got was a raw deal! Wow, I'm proud of my judicial system!
My dad was a lawyer by profession, probably the best decision he made 35 years ago was to give up law when he was a junior magistrate. Lawyers are assets of an country, only in this place they're too much of a liability! Everyday millions die with the hopes that they will make it big in this profession. The laws are lax, the people enforcing the laws are lax, the people are killed over million times again and again because of this ridiculous inefficient system.
Its not like I hate India, its just that they're not giving me too many reasons to love it! I'm just writing on what I see. Tomorrow if I demand justice, yea I trust my Judicial System so very much that they'll give me the just decision, after years of paperwork, adjourned courts, following stupid procedures, and yea, finally my grand grand grand kids will see the justice for me! Cheers!
Lets take a sneak peak into the World's most ridiculed judicial system! India has the biggest constitution in the World. Something to be proud of? Ummmm, crime rates are probably accelerating faster than Buggati Veyron! The root of the problem actually lies in the consistency of these rules! They're incomprehensive like English to a Bihari! The ones who drafted it, took 3 years to do it! They just forgot India has a life after they die! They did leave us with the procedure of amendment, just that its too complex, even more difficult than understanding Neurosurgery!
Anyway remembering the most remote version of Civics, the Executive is to be differentiated from the Judiciary! There should be no interference! Thats the ground rule! Okay funny because one guy makes the law the other guy executes it! They're talking like they're absolute experts on how things work! Good for them! We'll stick to the ground rule and deep dive into the judiciary wing!
Procedures! India is a country with procedure. Everything goes according to procedure! No no, we have a lot of time on our hands! We have to do everything by the book and then get fucked by the book as well! I'm not asking you to break the rules, but we can bend the rules to speed up proceedings. There are nearly 30 million pending cases in India, 30 million! Thats more than double the population of Mumbai! And we're still gonna do it by the book! Apparently even if all courts work day and night, 24 hours, they'll clear all the cases in another 320 years! Yes thats correct, 320 years! My grand grand grand children will be dead by then! And we're still gonna do it by the book!
Paperwork! The day India shifts to electronic systems, I'll probably stop taking the case of those poor Williams sisters! Everything has to be on paper! Come on guys seriously? We can save jungles by saving on those useless junk of archives that you're making for nothing! Further reference for cases can be done on computers! Why arent we using modern systems? Why are we still stuck on stone age? Adam and Eve would've had a facepalm moment by now! And then they come preaching about Global Warming!
The court is adjourned. We should have the electric chair for the retard who says this again and again for no reason. The court is adjourned for this break, that break, for the day, for 2 weeks, 10 weeks! Sit at home and enjoy your freaking food! You're here to speed up justice not speed up the list of cases!
Its really saddening to know this. The Chief Justice of the Supreme Court and High Court draw maximum salary in a bid to keep them off outside influence. Now even with all the government benefits, their salary cumulates to around Rs. 40,000 a month! What a JOKE! 40 grand a month for the loser who cant speed up justice! And then you say he should'nt be prone to outside influence! Two ways of looking at this is dishonorable impeachment in public or stepping it up to actually keep their coffers full of cash!
India doesnt even have a fully defined WITSEC plan! If you're not gonna protect your witness in an extreme high profile case then you cant blame him to go hostile! Duh! You would have done that yourself! I mean seriously you want me to step and put my life on stake for the sake of truth in an occurrence where I was just present for no fault of mine? Sure, I'd even want to sleep with some 3rd grade mallu porn actress! The Police lose key evidence thanks to negligence and not centralized evidence archiving is present in any city! Come on guys, wake up!
I feel for people who actually look up to these money making boulders for justice. No one really cares about what is happening. A girl gets raped today, she finally gathers some courage to file the case. The inspector might be bought off. If the case manages to go ahead to the court it'll come after some years, probably 10-15 when the girl is either dead or even over her trauma. And then she has to go through the whole procedure again. If the guy is charged with the crime, he can pay his way out by getting an expensive lawyer compared to the court hired magistrate. He could pay the judge off. He could pay a bail and be let off easily. So much wait for such an end? Yea sure its fitting!
Qasab is still enjoying the cherries of the Indian Judicial Ice cream he eats everyday. They cant find a hangman to hang him? Good enough to burn 4 crores on him though! Jessica Lall case took 7 years to bring the guilty to justice. The legal loopholes were exploited beyond all means to seek a parole which took another two weeks to ratify by the High Court! He got a 30 day parole! The issue went to the Supreme Court and in 2010 the sentence has been upheld, Jessica Lall was murdered in 1999! 11 years and the case is still on! Superb work guys! Funnily the guilty were also almost acquitted!
Here's a little line from there,"The police failed to recover the weapon which was used to fire at Jessica Lal as well as prove their theory that the two cartridges, emptied shells of which were recovered from the spot, were fired from one weapon,; “all three eyewitnesses listed by the police in its charge sheet, namely, Shiv Lal Yadav, an electrician at Tamarind Court, actor Shyan Munshi and Karan Rajput, a visitor at the restaurant that night, turning hostile during the trial."
The Bhopal Gas Tragedy totally adds to it! A leakage of Methyl Isocyanite killed 2300 people in 1984. The legal issue went on and on and on and on and on until 2010. It was because of a takeover of the Union Carbide Factory. And finally 8 ex employes were charged with $2000 fine and 2 years of imprisonment for death due to negligience. 25 years later! The case has hit a silver jubilee and all the families got was a raw deal! Wow, I'm proud of my judicial system!
My dad was a lawyer by profession, probably the best decision he made 35 years ago was to give up law when he was a junior magistrate. Lawyers are assets of an country, only in this place they're too much of a liability! Everyday millions die with the hopes that they will make it big in this profession. The laws are lax, the people enforcing the laws are lax, the people are killed over million times again and again because of this ridiculous inefficient system.
Its not like I hate India, its just that they're not giving me too many reasons to love it! I'm just writing on what I see. Tomorrow if I demand justice, yea I trust my Judicial System so very much that they'll give me the just decision, after years of paperwork, adjourned courts, following stupid procedures, and yea, finally my grand grand grand kids will see the justice for me! Cheers!
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